Sometimes the man you’re missing is yours, and you want to stay in his mind. There are many things you can do to ensure he’ll think of you. Have you ever cleaned your room and found an old movie stub or small item and had memories rush back? It’s amazing what a tiny item can do. Make a point of leaving a small memento behind in your man’s car or house. When he sees that earring or hair clip, you’ll come to mind, and he’ll want to see you that much more. DO NOT leave behind a toothbrush or other items that are of an intimate nature because this will surely cause him to panic. Think cute when it comes leaving a little piece of you at his place and he won’t be able to take his mind off of you.
And that’s it. You don’t ask him for anything. You also continue dating other men until you have the commitment that makes you happy. I know this is hard, but trust me when I say you are doing the best thing you possibly can to ensure your happiness. No man should ever feel like he’s your man of choice, he’s your “One,” or that you’re only seeing him. Not until he’s committed.
I met this guy at work. We started working together and became close friends. One day l invitedhim to my place. We were watching a movie (nothing romantic) and he kissed me. I hadnt seen it coming. I asked what that was all about and said if he wants me, he should say so. He said he likes me. He looked a bit young so l asked how hold he is. He would avoid a direct answer and say “l am old enough” or “l am not a child” and “Age doesnt matter”. He never asked me formally to be his girlfriend but he would treat me as such, we went on dates and communicated frequently. Then one day he said, by the way, l just made 26 years in May. I am 30. I was devastated considering l asked him ftom the start how old he is. He said he didnt tell me then because he was scared of how l would react. We talked about it and he said age doesnt matter. But then there were moments he wouldnt communicate. He would just shut me out and when l ask what is wrong, he will say he is getting through personal issues. I gave him space. We meet a lot at my place but never at his. When l called one day and his phone was off for two days, l went looking for his house (l dropped him home once but he didnt invite me in, saying his house was a mess and it was late). I found him home n he was shocked to see me. The pattern continued though…he being so all over me one time and withdrawn the next minute. So l sent him a ling message breaking it off. He didnt reply. But said hi at work and we spoke like normal workmates n he sent me a text about work. Recently l asked him why he didnt respond to my breakup message. He said it was complex and he wanted to give me my space. He asked if l am still his friend and l didnt respond and he got worked up about it. Since l broke things off, he communicates more…he even calls and texts in a tone friendlier than when we were together. I still have feelings for him but l dont know what this is. Did l push him away? Is he scared of me (l earn more, have a car and land and a car and a bigger house)? Is he worth another try (he is hard working, smart, caring even sometimes and has plans – we’d even talked kids and marriage) or l should stick to my breakup message and let go?
#1 You are too pushy. If you are coming on too strong and he is not in the same place in the relationship, he will likely start to withdraw. Guys don’t like feeling pressured into being with someone. Wanting to maintain control, if they feel as if you are moving too fast, trying to persuade them to take the relationship to a point they aren’t ready for, they will begin to pull back and try to create distance.
because only men pull away…all my life is full of all that “it’s not you it’s me” crap,every single time,you try to be nice,understanding,give time and offer encouragement and every time…this…i’m starting to think something is wrong with me,i am already in enough despair as it is and hearing this when i am choosing my words like before a trial or something…it is the most horrible feeling i have ever experienced,and i have been through loss,rough accidents and others…and this hurts worse than all together,the feeling of hopelessness when you pull out even your own soul to show that person everything will be alright and still…nothing.
They want a woman who answers questions honestly, and perhaps even volunteers information. They want a woman who confidently asks for her wants and needs to be met. They want a woman who can see the truth and tell it like it is while communicating with kindness. Men want a woman who can communicate without being too critical, and who cares about preserving his and her dignity. Women think men want them to be superficial, to keep quiet about their needs or wants, and never to ask for anything. Women think men believe them to be too needy and too sensitive, and that men simply want women to get over it. Some women believe they do not have the permission to tell it like it is, that they will be rejected for speaking up.
It sounds like it is the only reason. He started to have feelings for you, was unwilling to have a serious relationship again and he probably wanted to avoid leading you on any more than he had. While you had a lot in common and he was a wonderful partner, he is not in a place right now in his life to be serious about anyone. It looks like it was just bad luck that you started dating him so soon after his last relationship. All you can do right now is hope that he ends up missing you and deciding that he can have a committed relationship after all. Since that type of healing takes time, you should probably focus on moving on for now and getting over the relationship–it could be months or even years before he really feels ready for another committed relationship. Good luck!
There are many reasons why you and your ex stopped communicating following your breakup. Perhaps he told you to stop calling him, or maybe you blocked his number in your phone during one of your many post-breakup arguments. If you can’t have a one-on-one conversation with your ex, there is still a way you can secretly relay messages to him that will make him start to miss you! If the two of you have mutual friends, reconnect with a few of them and start telling them about all the great things that are going on in your life. The next time they bump into your ex, they will naturally tell him about your happy life. Consider these mutual friends to be your free message couriers, but use them wisely! Make sure to stay away from any topics that would put you in a negative light in your ex’s eyes.

I tried to ask him why and fix things but it got worse everytime I tried and when we were on the ph he ignored me the calls were silent and when I did say something he ignored me :( we used to be close we were friends on snapchat he chose to ignore me but still watched my mystory and it went on like that 4 weeks till I got upset and blocked him on my snapchat but still have him on Skype and his # we even would mail each other presents for holidays I fear he may have moved on and doesn’t like me anymore
To be clear, I was in no way making him chase me. I was warm and responsive. I was letting him lead and extremely responsive to that. If he wrote me, I wrote him, if he said love you, I said love you too. If he called, I called him back. If he did something for me, I would call and thank him. As to having time… I was responsive to his calls (clear about when I had plans, but would schedule a specific time), had time for 2-3 hour calls when he was out of town, and made time while I was on the other side of the world. I had also been very clear I was super excited to see him, even freeing up a possible 10 days for us to spend time and get to know each other.
Additional point is definitely if someone’s ready to spice up the sex life. This means that he can be sure that you will put some effort in keeping sex creative and fantastic. You should definitely expect this from him, but he needs to know that when the time comes to do something different, you will take initiative. You don’t need to go 50 Shades of Grey on him, but start by experimenting with moves you like and indulging your fantasies.
Your man may be withdrawing because he feels like you’re pressuring him to move the relationship along more quickly than he’s comfortable with. If this is the case, there’s a clear and obvious new boyfriend advice you need to take: back off. To stop a man from withdrawing because he’s feeling rushed, you have to let things calm down and create the opportunity for the relationship to develop at a pace that feels good for both of you.
Men do not like when women try to control them. If you want a faithful man, give him his personal space. This is probably the most important thing. My boyfriend has been registered for example on many dating sites. When we started dating I was worried that he still communicate with the girls there. When we start dating I was worried that he still communicate with the girls there. I really wanted to read his messages, but I restrained myself. As a result, he deleted his profile.

It was the spellcaster! He called me three times using WhatsAppp. Somehow he tracked my phone number! Creepy much? He left voicemails asking me if I was ready to cast a spell to get my ex back. Needless to say, I was so freaked out, I made myself a pot of coffee and stayed up working on Heal Your Heart and Win Him Back so you ladies never ever have to call a spellcaster!

During the courting process we’ve been conditioned to believe that men should be providers and women are caregivers and nurturers. This division of labour between the sexes has become a staple in nearly every walk of life, most notably, during the courting process. Despite society’s attempts to abolish traditional gender roles, many men still feel more inclined to “foot the bill;” as it is still considered a good gesture, and does nothing but increase our chances of being in your good book.
Hey girl, I don´t want to be rude intruding in something that´s clearly none of my business, but reading you has made me very upset about you boyfriend, or well, the father of your child. He needed space, but started seing someone else? I know you must love him, but that´s not a mature way to behave. If he can´t be responsible for his actions and its consequences, you should better move on. And you say it was a planned pregnancy, so there was a discussion and plenty of time to declare that he was not sure about it, if that is the case. It is very unfair that now he gets to decide if he wants to be there, in this stage of life, if he is “ready”, while you are already pregnant and shouldn´t it be something just yours. He is inmature, selfish and irresponsible, you don´t need another child to raise but the one you are carrying. So, I send you from very far away, all my strenghts and good wishes, put yourself up together and love yourself, so once the baby is born he/she will have a caring mom. The best for you and your baby, take care of yourself…
About Blog A divorced, mother of two, who is a Psychiatric Nursing Instructor by day and blogger by night. I am funny, upfront, honest and raw blogging about divorce, dating, grief, trauma, heartbreak and mother to an Asperger's teen. I'm hoping by sharing my life you learn that you do matter, you are enough, you have strength, and you are worthy of love!
Talk to your boyfriend about anything that has been going on in his life. Listen to what he has to say. Show him that you are interested to know all about it. By being a good listener, you will make him miss your presence all the time. Remember not to ask too many intruding questions as that could be a turn off. Don’t be so suspicious of him as he might think that you don’t trust him as well.
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If you harp on him and pester him to talk to you and open up he will see you as another source of stress in his life and will pull away even more. This creates a vicious cycle of you pushing him, him pulling back, you pushing more, and on and on until he either distances himself from you entirely or the relationship continues with an underlying tension. You can’t force someone to open up to you, especially when it comes to difficult emotional topics. You can invite them to open up, but you can’t badger them into it.

When you’ve won his affection, you don’t want to give up all of your time for him. Your man is not going to miss you if you’re constantly available. Instead of spending the whole weekend together, take a night off and go out with your friends. Not only will it make your man miss you, it’ll keep you sane. Don’t worry about him enjoying the free time. Your man may seem to enjoy the time alone at first, but eventually your man will crave more time with you. Of course, giving him space to enjoy his alone time is going to make you look confident and less clingy. Guys really like it when the girl they’re interested in isn’t always in his business. Give him his space and he’ll be calling you up in no time to hang out.
If you are calling, emailing, and texting your partner incessantly and also doing all the asking out, then a man will not even have to lift a finger. The best relationship advice for women from men is: You need to keep the communication in balance. This does not mean that you never ever reach out to the man that you are dating but, you should allow him to ask you out at least in the early stages.
Now that you have your new and improved wardrobe on deck, it’s time to switch up your appearance even further. We definitely vote against you chopping off your hair or doing anything drastic that you may regret later. Instead, try out a new hair color that will really make you stand out. Switching up your hair is the equivalent to changing up your wardrobe. You’re drawing attention to yourself by changing up your look, and we guarantee it will leave your ex drooling! If you’ve always rocked the same hair color, try spicing things up, like with a balayage hair color treatment. This French hair color technique works on a variety of hair lengths, colors and textures - making it a flattering option for all women. Don’t be surprised if your ex doesn’t recognize you at first, but when he does, he will be floored...and maybe even a little turned on!

Why men pull away is a mystery to women, especially younger women who are trying to make their man to commit, everything is going perfectly fine, and all of sudden their boyfriend starts acting distant. If you find yourself in a similar situation, you may be having unlimited questions about what the exact reason is why he is acting distant and cold. You may be thinking if you did something wrong. This can make you feel hurt, angry, and confused. There could be various reasons why your boyfriend or husband is acting distant and withdrawing from you. Maybe your boyfriend does not want a long-term relationship with you, or maybe your husband is having issues at his work place and he is trying to find a solution. Maybe none of these reasons are true and there is no spark left in your relationship and it’s time to move on.

because only men pull away…all my life is full of all that “it’s not you it’s me” crap,every single time,you try to be nice,understanding,give time and offer encouragement and every time…this…i’m starting to think something is wrong with me,i am already in enough despair as it is and hearing this when i am choosing my words like before a trial or something…it is the most horrible feeling i have ever experienced,and i have been through loss,rough accidents and others…and this hurts worse than all together,the feeling of hopelessness when you pull out even your own soul to show that person everything will be alright and still…nothing.
Imagine you go on a couple dates with a guy, and the chemistry is awesome. You have loose plans to hang out the following weekend. But then, he goes silent for the weekend. You’re puzzled because things went really well on the dates, but you play it cool because you’re a sexy, single lady and you don’t invest more emotionally in a guy than he’s investing in you.
For some the search can be long and difficult, and for others it can be quick and easy. A lot of variables go into the length, ease, and success of that search, but the one thing that will boost your efforts is how well you present yourself. It’s imperative, especially early on, that you look your best every time we see you, at least for the first few months of the relationship. This is not men being vain or superficial. Unless your father is Bill Gates, how you look is the strongest magnet you possess. Your hair must be done, your nails neatly painted, and your clothes should highlight your assets and hide your liabilities. Loose sweats, uncombed hair pulled back under a baseball cap, and rundown Ugg boots are fine once the relationship is in high gear, but definitely a turn-off when at the beginning. In our minds, if you are not making the effort to look your best when we barely know each other, we dread the thought of what you’ll look like a couple of months into the relationship.

Here;s an interesting one and maybe I am being a brat but I’m going to ask anyway. Late October I started seeing this guy. I did everything wrong one the first date, but I din’t care one bit because I honestly didn’t find him to be great looking. Super nice, great dresser, good body, but different than I expected. Anyway, we went out again because if a guy seems to have most of the qualities I like, if I think he’s super nice and cool, I’ll give it a try. We sleep together on date 2 and again, I DON’T CARE that I probably should not have. He still wants to see me though. After date four, I decide I’m just trying to like the guy so I tell him I can’t see him anymore. I don’t say exactly why but that something is not there.He starts to ask why and then backs off (smart) and takes it like a gentleman.That was after like 2 weeks. The next day or two all I do is tell my friends about this and it occurs to me I’m thinking about him nonstop. So I text him and BAM! Back together, dating and having the best sex I have EVER had in my life. We text a lot, he intiates, I don’tact needy at all… It’s nice, it’s warm, it’s sexy, it’s just great. THEN… his mom dies. He has to leave town but he just keeps on texting me the whole time. Before that he even invited me into his own world at a ceremony he had to attend. Up to this point he says thing like when you meet so and so and things like that. While out of town, everything is still great and he says he doesn’t want to dwell on his mom.I respect that so I don’t push at all. Before he gets back he he says he needs to take me to his home town (a popular vacation destination). When he gets back I meet him but his flight was delayed so it’s pretty late (not normal for us to do late night stuff like that). I even said if it’s too late let’s reschedule. He says no so I go. The next day is fine… texting blah blah blah, but the following day he seems to be distant. I do nothing. The next day, today, I text him first. He says he had a headache the day before but it’s probably stress over deciding to leave an old job for a new one and a lawsuit he’s in. He then tells me about it. But…. he definitely seems more distant than when his mom died, so I’m thinking am I just being a complete brat here or is he actually losing interest. It seems really obvious to me but I have recently decided I don’t make excuses for a man’s behaviour any more. If they want you, no matter the circumstances, you know it. what’s your take? Feel free to completely call me out, if I am just being a big baby here. At this point, I actually do really like the guy. I wish he would say something like “I’m cray about you” or something but his actions up to this point have been great so saying words may be a bit much to expect less than 2 months in anyway. Either way, I just want to know if I should completely bail at this point because I hate this feeling!
Right on from the man’s perspective. The kind of things like “you’re in the doghouse” is exactly what drives men away. Respect goes both ways in a relationship, and it’s not a battle of the sexes. When women see it as “men vs. women” it’s half over already. It’s not to say men are not jerks — many are. But if the love and connection are strong, then be respectful. If we guys want to have me time or gain some perspectives by retreating, please let us do so instead of making us feel even worse, like we’re scum…. and we will respect more of you, as we also know you need your space too from time to time. A relationship is a fluid thing and we need to adjust and adapt. Mostly, we need to respect each other.
Hi, I have been talking with a man that is older then me. He is very private and he needed space so I gave it to him. Out of respect cause I once was in his shoes. And found myself again when i had my own time. We haven’t had sex in the months we been together. Just talking and enjoying one another company. There are times he asks me to stay with him more now days and I do. Still no Sex, alot of kissing and holding. Then we both stop one another before it goes further. Why? Idk but we respect one another more. But I have noticed we have recently stopped talking like we use to. The convos shorten. Our conversations are about our days, and some sexting or just straight talk n tease about being romantic. We just have fun. I do know he dont to hurt me, n he is afraid of his own actions. He’s the touchy feely type with women. And it surprises him I don’t get mad or jealous. He tells me he ain’t use to the way I act towards stuff like that. I’ve asked him if he’s trying to push me away he says no then he says maybe… I don’t feel he is cheating, I just think we are both scared to take the next step. Cause we both hurt and was hurt in our last relationships. Getting confused need some advice.
I was in a situation that still confuses me. Maybe you can help. I know long distance is hard, but I was in one for 4 months. I showed up great – warm, joyous, playful. We had seen each other 3 times and were planning on a visit at the holidays. Due to previous things that were planned for both of us – international travel and grad school exams, we knew it would be 8 weeks to see each other. He travelled and we spoke 4 times over 12 days for 2-3 hours, just having fun. When he got back, he called 10 times in 6 days, emailed, texted, and wrote me a letter about what an amazing influence I was and how we had this great chemistry. He started saying “love you” at the end of a few calls, and I said “love you too”, but never initiated it as I knew we were falling and needed to see each other. I went on an international vacation for 2 weeks and common times to talk were difficult (and I was having fun). We spoke twice by Skype with him asking when we could speak again. We scheduled a third and I emailed him once or twice telling him what fun stuff was happening and wishing him well on his studying. The last call he was late for, which it felt dispointed as I had asked if he just wanted to talk when I was home and he insisted we set up a time. I only said it once, he apologized and we let it go.
Trust your instincts from the very first contact with a potential boyfriend.  Did he get a little too drunk on your initial dates?  A man who can’t get through the early stages of a relationship without using alcohol may have substance abuse issues.  Is he perpetually late, always offering bogus excuses?  He doesn’t value your time so don’t expect him to suddenly be punctual when you need him to be somewhere important.  Do you get a sense he is hiding something when he finds reasons why you can never come to his place?  Key into your visceral responses when you pick up vibes that don’t sit right with you.  Don’t make the mistake so many women make, thinking that all these negative behaviors will change once he falls in love with you.  They won’t.  They may even get worse.
Before you can call him your boyfriend and organize a group chat with your friends on how to make him want a relationship, you have to know who he is. We all idealize our man, and became blind to some deal breakers. Don’t pull your A game and have him crawling to you, just to find out that he is a conspiracy theorist, or he has a bad temper. Talk, scroll a bit his timeline, and find out if you want to be with him after all. Don’t say immediately yes, because he’s handsome or has some qualities you like. Investigate a bit, and see if he’s worthy of your effort.

Men are rules by their egos. It is somethng that they cannot seem to help as it is just a part of their makeup. If he thinks that you really want him to be committed, he might do the opposite. Why? Men do not like to be led to think that they have been coerced or led somewhere that they had no intention of going. To get him to commit dont even think about forcing him to. If you have been trying hard to get him to see only you, the best thing is to pause your campaign and just enjoy where you are in the relationship. You have already expressed the desire to commit and if he wants to, no amount of force will get him there. Jut relax and allow him to see the real you and you wont need to bend his arm to be committed to you. The more you make it seem unimportant the more he will want you to want commitment from him.


I’m on the other side of the coin. I’ve been dating a woman for three years and she is a raging workaholic. We rarely spend time together, if we do she falls asleep, or we have time to do nothing because she always has to be AT WORK. Living together would solve some of the problems but she always has an excuse as to why she works all the time or some martyr-ific After two years, I’ve finally gotten tired of trying to communicate my feelings and am taking time for myself. It’s hard to talk when you feel that someone is not listening.
As humans, we value things we need to work for, and if something we work for suddenly gets pulled away, it drives us crazy. So while he might have thought he could coast along, texting you to get together whenever it was convenient for him, you’ve made it clear that you value yourself more than that. He will need to work hard to be in your world…and your cool and collected response makes him want to.
i admit, being in a relationship feels like riding a roller coaster. when it is going up you feel very excited but when it goes down, that is when you are feeling unwell. i want to make sure that my boyfriend would still miss me even if we spend a lot of times together. we’ve been together for almost 5 years now and i want the spark to always be there. will make this article my source.
It’s as simple as that. If you feel like something’s not right, in all probability, something is definitely wrong. Communicate and make the effort. At times, the relationship may be a failed cause because your man’s a bad guy. But almost always, the relationship stagnates because you and your lover have started to take the relationship for granted. [Read: 25 relationship rules for a successful long term relationship]
Does he seem like he has one foot out the door? Like he’s not fully invested? When you bring up the topic of where things are going, does he avoid the question or say he’s not ready to talk about it? This can feel like he’s pulling away, but think about it: maybe he’s not pulling away. Maybe he’s standing still and you’re pushing. It might feel the same to you, but there’s a difference.
After a few months, the calls and texts slowed down, I was still visiting, but not sure where I stood with him,I would text, and his responses weren’t the same as before, I started to think he wasn’t interested anymore, he would sometimes bring up the fact that he is not able to like or love someone on the emotional level, I felt like he was backing off. I just got back 2 days ago and while I was there I asked him if he liked me or had feelings for me, he looked sad but said no he doesn’t have feelings for me and he can’t like anyone because he doesn’t like himself. He would say “just keep being my friend”. I am heart broken over it….
I’ve been separated for 2 years now and was always trying to read about relationships, and understand what went wrong in my situation. So one after another, and onother so so book purchase lead me finally to your book! I pushed myself and finally started dating again. I’m dating this guy for one month now and your articles are absolutely priceless and of a high value to me! I would even really like to have a session of your advice in person, if it’s possible:), maybe you visit Boston any time soon?:)
Ok so I met this guy on tinder (yeah I know) so anyways we talk for like a week and a half we meet we both become infatuated, he pops the I love you (first) and I go along with it even though I feel it’s early. So we were “talking” for a month became fb official and a month after that I met his parents briefly, everything is hot for about a month then it slowly starts to die off. Ok well during this whole time of talking and being bf gf we only talked on the phone say 4 maybe 5 times (not including if we had plans and called each other for quick info or what not) all of our conversations were through snapchat and text…. So slowly the text and snapchat is dying off and I’m like and he not making plans as much and he’s flaking out on me… So I told him I felt him pulling away and he sends me very short replies to my messages and now he won’t talk to me at all. I’m thinking now that I’ve typed this all out. Leaving him alone would be my best bet… Huh?
I don’t care if you like it.  I don’t care if you think it’s fair or unfair. It is a simple truth that people value those who bring a unique, special, meaningful value to the table.   If you honestly think that you can have a man want to choose you and only you forever without bringing something deeply valuable to him… then you’re either choosing very low -quality men or you just haven’t thought through reality yet.
At the tender age of 24 I’ve met 2 10/10 kinda guys, they had the looks, the charm, the intelligence, etc, they were a “catch”. However, long story short, the sad fact is that neither of them wanted me. The point is that no matter how much of a catch a guy can be, if he doesn’t want you move on. Like I’ve said in a previous comment, if he’s not giving you a “hell yeah!” vibe, you best be moving onto the guy who will want you. You can never trick or convince a guy to fall for you. And usually you only find this out after seriously losing yourself in the chase.
I don’t care if you like it.  I don’t care if you think it’s fair or unfair. It is a simple truth that people value those who bring a unique, special, meaningful value to the table.   If you honestly think that you can have a man want to choose you and only you forever without bringing something deeply valuable to him… then you’re either choosing very low -quality men or you just haven’t thought through reality yet.
Hey I am currently dealing with this with my boyfriend I just came across these tips I don’t think its too late to try. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and we have conceived two children within our relationship a 4year old girl and 2year old boy. Lately my boyfriend has been under tremendous stress and I haven’t acknowledged that so I was adding on to his stress by arguing and nagging I ended up pushing him away now and I think for good this morning before he left he said hes done for good because I kept forcing to fix the problem. I’m struggling on giving him his space because we live together in a studio its hard to walk past him everyday and just not talk to him. How do I give him his space and just have distance I am a stay at home mom so I don’t work and I don’t leave the house I’m home with my kids. Any tips on how to enforce the space so he can clear hos mind I know he loves me dearly hes just very stressed out and wants to clear his mind on his own he said so himself.
OMG…I think we’re in the same exact place. And after reading this article, I think I know exactly what to do. I’ve been so consumed with getting hurt again, that I’ve totally missed the fact that the guy I was previously dating kept wanting to hold on to me, even though he keeps saying he doesn’t want a relatinship. THAT’S A CLEAR TED FLAG FOR ME. I recently broke it off with him because he refused to commit, but the next time, I’ll get it right….THIS ARTICLE IS SO PROFOUND!
i have been dating this guy for almost six months now, we have not started having sex, because i told him i am not ready we have talked about it and he agreed. But of late i feel he is pulling away, sometimes he will not call or text me unless if i call him or text him first, he is always postponing our dates and its like he does not want to see me, when i ask him he says he is just busy with work or he could not call me because he had no credit in his phone, i don’t really know what to do? should i just leave him alone or i continue calling or texting him first all the time…, does it mean he has lost interest in me? please help ,

Hey! I’m 19& I may have a crush on this guy who approached me in WhatsApp! I was distant at first cuz that’s what I’m like with strangers ,especially guys, who tries to talk to me even when I make it clear that I don’t want to have a conversation with them. But now its been two months and turns out he is not some stranger, he is in same college as me and we have two out of four classes together.
My boyfriend has a small company “hobby” and seems to spend a lot of time and effort into that. When I try to talk to him he ignores me even when I leave him alone for hours. He seems to be more interested in his “hobby” than listening or just telling me how his day went. I don’t pry at all but after work of not talking to him all day all he wants to do is his “hobby” I don’t feel valued right now and just wanted to vent about it really.

You have given the best advice that I have ever read from any article or book out there and trust I have read MANY. I see where I have been going wrong with my relationships and I see that I am putting too much of what I want them to be for me in it. I see where my negative thoughts have failed me and how I can go about changing me to be a better me for a relationship. Your views are so on point and I completely understand exactly where you are coming from. I will continue to read and reread your advice until I get myself where I need to be physically and emotionally. I definitely dont live in the moment with the man I have been with and I have gotten the I dont want a relationship thing from him but I definitely see where I went wrong because this man was interested in me from the beginning and he is still here. So I see where I went wrong. I see where I need to change just from reading your articles. I am seeing clearly. Now just to adjust my behavior and actions. I believe I will see a change in him. You cant expect people to change if you dont change yourself first… Thanks for all the great advice :)

I’ve been in a long distance relationship for a little over a year. We have been through so much in the time we’ve been together and I can honestly say that I am in love with him. He started to drift away and I kept pushing. Today I asked him did he need a break and he told me he think he did. I immediately felt heartbroken and didn’t know what to do so I panicked. I started to tell him how I didn’t want a break and that I wanted to fix it. I asked him what changed and he told me everything. I then begged him to just try. I realized that I’m forcing the relationship witch will only have a heavier hurt in the end . There’s so much more behind this but here’s the basis. I told him I loved him then I asked him could we please keep trying. He replied I love you too and said okay. Shortly after I regrettably started to nag him to talk to me. He then began to ignore me. I realized that I’m making him feel trapped in this relationship and that’s the last thing I want to do. So I sent him this a couple of hours ago : I realized that I haven’t been being myself at all and I’m sorry for that. I’m forcing you and I don’t want to do that to you. I realized that you were pulling away and I kept trying to push you back in. I’ve always told you that I love you and even if we are not together I want you to be happy. I’ve been thinking about this all night and the dream I had really opened my eyes.i Really do love you and as much as this hurts i never wanted you to feel like you are trapped in a relationship. If you really need a break and need time I’m willing to give you that. I just wish it didn’t have to result to a break because only god knows how much I’ll miss you ‍♀️ but if it’s what you really want than I understand. I am patiently waiting on a response. I honestly just want to know, if I really give him the time will he come back or have I completely blew it already ?


I saw a whatsapp pick of a workmate on my guys phone, he said he used it to let someone leave him alone I got a bit jealous and now he for the first time in our relationship got distant and didn’t answer my calls or texts, I decided to leave him alone since he’s very busy with work but I saw him and it seems he’s chasing me down and came up to me, we had a good brief conversation, though short but I can sense he was happy to see me.


i miss my boyfriend , we are in highschool and usually we txt throughout the day , its just rlly nice . rn it is winter break and not only that he broke his phone , sooo rn i have to deal with missing him . there are times that i miss him incredibly much but in a way i also am "thankful" that we cant talk bc that teaches me to be more independent ( which i am use to losing when i am in a relationship ) . its a bitter sweet kinda thing .
My boyfriend for 4 months started calling and texting less as of the second week of January. It is true that he had some successive things happening one after the other which also prevented us for meeting since the new years eve. But despite that I let him know that I wasn’t happy with his careless behaviour. By the third week of January the date of his thesis submission approached and it just got worse. As I got bady ill for 4 days and he didn’t even get briefed because he did not ask how I was although he kept the conversation, I exploded on him and told him aaaalll I felt and went through and how he was absent when I needed him. My message just stayed unread on purpose till the morning and he tried to start a new normal conversation as usual like nothing happened. I was pissed off so I answered short, late, and tough. He stopped talking and by the time I cooled down he was already shut off. I ended up keeping the conversation somehow as he stopped initiating. By the following weekend I was near his area and we were talking so I asked if he feels like going out having some air. He made an excuse and I just headed home. We talked less and less through the following week, by thursday night we had a light chat and I asked how he was, he said that he was very tired and unhappy. As I asked why, is it going bad at work, my message just stayed unread till the morning. It was Friday 9 Feb. And he was quite responsive through the day, so I asked to meet and as he kept making excuses related to work, I just pushed more. So he just stopped responding to my messages and calls. Yes I know I did aaaall kinds of the things to avoid in these situations but I could not help but to see and understand what was happening to him that he had to express his unhappiness. After this incident I just disappeared too until valentine’s day at around 10 pm. I sent a brief apology message for my harsh words and putting the blame on him (when I exploded on him) while he was already having a hard time by himself. I wished him good luck with his upcoming thesis presentation (16 Feb) and wished him that he would never tell anybody again that he is tired and unhappy as he said to me the week before. I got an answer for this message that I was a wonderful girl and very understanding and I have nothing to apologise for and thanks for the good wishes and that I deserve the best and he hopes I will find what I deserve.
Simply, wear your signature scent whenever you meet your boyfriend so that slowly he will start recognizing you with that smell. As much as possible, use the top quality brand of perfume, shampoo, or lotion. Just imagine yourself resting on his shoulder or chest, and leaving behind your beautiful scent on his body, this will leave him thinking about you every time he smells something even faintly similar.
In my opinion, men are less mature than women when it comes to relationship matters like this. I am a man, and I can see that our reasons for pulling away can be silly sometimes. Like the article says, we pull away because we are bored, we are jealous, or we don’t have relationship skills. The one good reason we have here is we are focused on work or school (This could be real, or we say it sometimes as an excuse). Anyway, I believe women usually have better reasons for ending a relationship than men. This is just an opinion, if you are a man, please don’t take it as an offend.
If you’re a woman and have any questions to ask, unsure in regards to your partner, insecure, upset or worried about something, please, share it in this relationship advice for women board and the community can advise and provide caring advice to help you combat your relationship issues. If you aren’t a woman, and you’re a bloke, then we would recommend that you post in our relationship advice for men forum board, you’ll receive better answers there.
We spent that summer together inseperable after that. At the end of the summer he told me he loves me. In that moment I truly forgave him and saw that he had made the mistake out of fear, and open wounds from his last (and only) real relationship… I realized the poor guy had never even experienced true partnership and love… I was excited to show him how a real partnership can be, and how lovable he is.
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